Time to Look Back but Forge Forward

The start of a new year is often a great time for reflection on where you have been and making some plans, goals, resolutions about what you want for the future. 2020 was a rollercoaster of a ride for most and no easy task if you are in the process of divorce. At any stage of the divorce process, this is an ideal moment in time to take stock of where you have been and in which direction you are headed – think of it as an opportunity to craft the next step in your journey.

Some thoughts, ideas and resolutions that might help in the planning process for the new year and the next steps might include:

Choose Your Battles

Depending on what stage of your divorce you are in – very initial or about to sign papers the emotional strain of handling your spouse or ex-spouse can be mentally and emotionally draining. Make a plan to find common ground – arguing over the DVD set or the lawnmower is doing nobody any favors in the long run. Being upset by a snarky text or voicemail is not going to be productive to communication flows. Choose this year to be results-oriented and find agreeable solutions  – it will make the whole process easier in the end.

Learn from your mistakes

This is a great time for self-reflection and assessment. Although many people going through divorce may be eager to jump back into the dating pool or try and jump into a new relationship this is a great time for your own personal review!  What was great about your last relationship?  What worked? What didn’t? Why did it fall apart? What could you have done differently?  Jumping in too quickly could result in repeated patterns and situations  – allow yourself a little breathing room and some time for yourself  – identify what you want and where you want to be.


There is no shame in asking for help – friends, family, support groups. This can be a daunting time and a time filled with a lot of emotions and feelings.  People understand you may need a helping hand – don’t be afraid to ask.

Financial Planning

Take cake control and manage your finances. Whether you are already financially savvy or need a helping hand  – take time to understand your budgets, incomes, expenses and savings for a rainy day. If in doubt seek the help of a financial advisor to guide you through. 

Tying up the loose ends

Leading on from the previous point, if you are at the end of the divorce process now is a great time to assess the “loose ends” – by this we mean things like who is the beneficiary of your life insurance policy? Who will be your Health Care Proxy if anything happens to you? Do you have a plan for the children if anything happened to either parent?  Are both your wills updated?

Necessary plans that should be made to keep things moving along in case the inevitable happens

Speak to the Experts

If you are thinking about divorce or are needing advice on the divorce process – our team of Certified experts and mediators are willing and ready to help. We offer full-service divorce and co-parenting mediation services. Contact us today if you want to talk about any point you are at in the divorce process. We can offer you support and guidance when you need it most.

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