Considering the fact that divorce stems from unhappiness in a marriage, having a happy one seems like an oxymoron. Granted, no one goes into a marriage looking forward to its end, but sometimes splitting up is for the best. And when that’s the case, there’s no reason to make the situation even more difficult with a long, drawn-out battle. Instead, here’s how to have a happy divorce.
1. Learn Then Look Forward
Chances are, both you and your spouse made mistakes during the marriage. Regardless of which one messed up the most, it’s not helpful to get stuck in the blame game. Instead, learn from the lessons in your marriage and do your best to let go. Yes, give yourself time to mourn the loss, but recognize your divorce as a step in the direction towards the happiness you deserve in life.
2. Avoid Rinse and Repeat Reactions
What we mean here is to try your best to avoid falling into the same old patterns during the divorce process. Yes, you each know how to push each other’s buttons and it’s tempting to try to “win” against each other. But when that happens, you’re only hurting yourself because it will likely just drag things out and cause your spouse to dig in on things that could have been more easily resolved in the process. Resist the temptation (or the bait from your spouse) and think of the end game; a successful divorce and your freedom.
3. Focus On the Kids’ Wellbeing
If you have kids together, even once you split up, you’re still a family. And you need to figure out a way to co-parent amicably for the sake of your kids’ wellbeing. One way to do that is to try to separate your issues with your spouse from your parenting. While this may seem an impossible feat, it can help to try to see the other parent as your kids see them. For example, think of them as mommy or daddy and not the person who hurt you by doing X, Y, and Z.
Mediation Helps Facilitate a Happy Divorce
Mediation is an alternative to litigating your divorce in court in which you and your spouse enlist a neutral third party to help you resolve issues such as distribution of assets, child custody, child support, and alimony. Keep in mind the mediator does not resolve issues for you and your spouse. Rather they act as an intermediary to offer opinions, brainstorm solutions, and guide you in communicating effectively in addition to keeping you focused on working together towards an amicable agreement.
There are many benefits to mediation. Not only is it quicker and more cost-effective than litigation, but it’s also less confrontational and more private. And the communication techniques you learn during mediation can also benefit you both as you co-parent going forward.
What’s more, our mediation services are completely virtual which gives you added flexibility and convenience!
For more information on our mediation services, contact our experienced team today!
